it's all about LOVE!


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10 Romantic Relationship tips that work...

12.26.2010
Tip #1: DECIDE to become more romantic and you WILL become more romantic. It’s as simple as that. Start now. Your lover will be thrilled.

Tip #2: Love yourself first. If you don’t love yourself then you really and truly are not ready to give your love to another. Take care of yourself, mentally and physically. Take charge of who you are and assume responsibility for cultivating your strengths and getting clear about what is important to you.

Tip #3:Be true to yourself. Listen to your heart. Go with your gut. Be your best self as often as you can manage.

Tip #4:Listen with an open heart. When your lover speaks to you, always try to be open to what they have to offer. Let them say all that they have to say without interrupting them.

Relationship Tip #5:Ask for what you want. Once you figure out what your priorities are and what it is that you want out of life and from your mate, don’t be afraid to ask for it. It is unlikely that your partner is a mind reader. They will probably be delighted to hear what it is that they can do for you.

Tip #6:Stay curious. There is always more to learn about your love. As your relationship deepens, new layers of personality will be revealed for you to explore. Never assume that you know everything there is to know about your mate. People continue to grow and develop as they go through different stages in their lives. As you change and expand, the dynamics of your relationship can shift. Stay on your toes! Riding the waves of change with your beloved can enrich your relationship, deepen your love and keep things interesting.

Tip #7:Be proactive in your romance. Take the reigns and be a moving force in creating the kind of romantic relationship that you want. There is no need to “settle for less” when you are committed to “writing” your own storybook romance. The more you participate, the more rewarding your romantic journey will be! Let this power be a source of inspiration for you!


Relationship Tip #8:
Get THE ROMANCE HABIT: It is said that to make a new habit, you must repeat the action for twenty-one days in a row before it will really stick. Three weeks isn’t very long to practice something that is rewarding in of itself and makes our partner glow with adoration! Your new romance skills will also serve you and your beloved for years to come. Practice DOES makes perfect when it comes to coming up with unique romantic ideas . The more romantic you act, the more romantic you become. And once you have the Romance Habit, you will probably never lose it. The rewards are simply too great.

Tip #9:Be kind to your beloved. Always remember that you two are on the same team! Give them the benefit of the doubt, even when others tell you not to. It is likely that you know your beloved better than anyone else does. Expect the best and that is what you are likely to get.

Relationship Tip #10:Be a hopeless romantic. When you shower your mate with words of love and romantic moments, you greatly increase the odds that they will reciprocate with romantic ideas of their own. Your partner is much more likely to “romance” a sweet and loving partner than a curmudgeon pouting about the lack of romance in the relationship. [romantic-idea-online,2010]

10 Common Reasons causing break-up relationship

12.20.2010
Conflict and stress are part of most love relationships. These reasons couples break up and relationships fail can help you heal and learn to love again.
Working towards a healthy love relationship is one of the most rewarding and challenging things you’ll ever do! These ten reasons couples break up and relationships fail describe the most common problems couples face.

These tips will help couples build long-term love, and help broken hearts heal after a relationship breakup.

Why Do Couples Break Up?

1. Failing to keep promises, lying, or cheating. These blatant violations of trust often result in failed relationships. If the basic trust in a love relationship is repeatedly broken, the problems accumulate and the motivation to stay together decreases. Partners in healthy relationships agree to reconcile their differences – and if they keep their promises, the relationship can stay strong. However, consistent lying, cheating, or breaking of promises can explain why relationships end.

2. Imbalance of power. A common reason couples break up is when one partner has more decision-making power than the other. When one person usually makes the decisions about activities, friends, financial matters, household matters, holidays, and so on, the relationship can become unstable. If a sense of equality doesn’t exist, a failed relationship could be the result.

3. Acceptance of stereotypes. Mistaken gender myths include beliefs such as “Men like sex more than women” or “Women are passive” or “Men make more money than women.” If one partner believes these stereotypes, false expectations are created – resulting in higher chances of a failed relationship. An equal balance of power can save your marriage.

4. Isolation. A common reason couples break up is isolation from friends and family when the couple first gets together. Intimate love relationships based on fear and insecurity (which is why couples isolate themselves) aren’t stable, and exacerbate other problems – which can lead to a relationship breakup.

5. Lack of self-knowledge. If one or both partners aren’t in tune with their interests, needs, desires, future plans, goals, values, sexual attitudes, and preferences – then it’s difficult for them to engage in a healthy relationship. Self-knowledge helps partners communicate who they are and what they want – which can prevent the breakup of a romantic relationship. This can be a reason why couples break up, especially if they got together when they were young.

6. Low self-esteem, insecurity, and lack of self-confidence. A common reason couples break up is because one partner feels unworthy of being loved. This insecurity can lead to possessiveness and overdependence, which isn’t healthy for a love relationship. Building self-esteem and self-confidence is one way to avoid relationship failure (but each partner must do this for him or herself).

7. Excessive jealousy. “Jealousy is cited as one of the most frequent causes of the breakup of romantic relationships,” writers Roger Hock in Human Sexuality. Delusional jealousy can trigger abuse and violence, which can (and should) be why relationships end. Delusional jealousy isn’t a common problem couples face – but normal jealousy can be.

8. Ineffective communication. If both partners can’t share their thoughts, feelings, opinions, values, needs, frustrations, or even their joys, a failed relationship could result. If this was the cause of a breakup, then learning to love again could involve learning how to communicate effectively. This is a common reason for breaking up.

9. Control issues. If one partner is trying to control or manipulate the other, the love relationship can become weak – or even dangerous. This reason why relationships end may be seen in different ways, such as checking up on the partner, name-calling, threatening the partner, requiring the partner check in all the time, or not allowing any deviations from the partner’s schedule. This isn’t loving behavior, and it results in failed relationships.

10. Abuse. This is the most obvious, surefire way to reason why couples break up. Different types of abuse are attempts to gain total control over a partner. Though relationships like this should end immediately, many partners stay for various complicated reasons. Learning to love and trust again can be difficult if this is the reason the relationship ended.

Conflict and stress are part of most marriages and love relationships – but being aware of the common reasons couples break up can help them work towards a healthy love relationship. [suite101.com,2010]

When you are in love...

When you are together with that special someone, you pretend to ignore that person. But when that special someone is not around, you might look around to find them. At that moment, you are in love.

Although there is someone else who always makes you laugh, your eyes and attention might go only to that special someone. Then, you are in love.

Although that special someone was supposed to have called you long back, to let you know of their safe arrival, your phone is quiet. you are desperately waiting for the call! That is when you are in love.

If you are much more excited for one short email/message from that special someone than other many long texts, you are in love.

When you find yourself as one who cannot erase all the emails or SMS in your phone bcoz of one message from that special someone, you are in love.

You keep telling yourself "that special someone is just a friend", but you realize that you cannot avoid that person's special attraction. At that moment, you are in love.

While you are reading this text, if someone appears in your mind, then that person is your special someone. :)

What is love....

12.13.2010
Each one of us has its own definition of LOVE. There are also different kinds of Love such as the love for our children or parent love to their children, Love for our friends, love for our hobby, love for our pet, love for our neighbor and many more. Nevertheless, there is also we called love to the opposite sex like your bf/gf or husband/wife. We fell in love because we choose to let them in to our lives. If you won't allow a person to get involved in your life I'm sure you won't fell inlove with him. That is why I guess there are lots of relationship didn't work out not because they are not meant for each other. It never work out because they choose not to work it out. Oh love, easy to spell but hard to understand. It's only a four letter word but it had broad meaning.
Anyway, I found this scientific and unscientific answers to the question What Is Love? I'm sure you will enjoy reading this and give your own personal opinion about it.

Scientific Answers of What Love Is ~

Researchers (Hatfield & Rapson, 1995) have broken up love into two main types:

* Passionate love which involves continuously thinking about the loved one and also involves warm sexual feelings and powerful emotional reactions.
* Companionate love is having trusting and tender feelings for someone who is close to you.

Now one of the best known theories of love (which means an educated guess that isn't proven fact) is Robert Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love.

The three components of the Triangular Theory of Love are:

Passion, the feeling physically aroused and attracted to someone.

Passion is what makes you feel "in love" and is the feeling most associated with love. It also rises quickly and strongly influences and biases your judgment.

Intimacy, the feeling close and connected to someone (developed through sharing and very good communications over time).

Intimacy is what makes you want to share and offer emotional and material support to each other.

Commitment, pledging to your self and each other to strengthen the feelings of love and to actively maintain the relationship.

Commitment is what makes you want to be serious, have a serious relationship and promise to be there for the other person if things get tough.

Now Sternberg also uses his Triangular Theory of Love to answer some of the most commonly asked questions about love:

Is there love at first sight?

This is when we are overwhelmed by passion, without any intimacy or commitment (both of which take time). Sternberg calls this infatuated love, Because there is not intimacy or commitment, infatuated love is fated to fade away.

Why do some people get married after being in love for a very short time?


This is a combination of passion and commitment, but without any intimacy. Sternberg calls this Hollywood love. This is where two people make a commitment to each other based on their passion. Unless intimacy develops over time, this relationship most likely will end.

Can their be love without sex?

Ah yes, companionate love, where intimacy and commitment are present without any sexual passion.

Why doesn't romantic love last?

Passion and intimacy without commitment is Romantic love. When the passion fades, and the intimacy wanes, the relationship ends.

Now, here is the unscientific answers about what love is, check it out if you are familiar with the answers.

Unscientific Answers

Are your palms sweaty, is your heart racing, And your voice caught within your chest?

* It isn't Love, it's Like.

You can't keep your eyes or hands off of them, am I right?

* It isn't Love, it's Lust.

Are you proud, and eager to show them off?

* It isn't Love, it's Luck.

Do you want them because you know they're there?

* It isn't Love, it's Loneliness.

Are you there because it's what everyone wants?

* It isn't Love, it's Loyalty.

Do you stay for their confessions of Love, because you don't want to hurt them?

* It isn't Love, it's Pity.

Are you there because they kissed you, or held your hand?

* It isn't Love, it's being Unconfident.

Do you belong to them because their sight makes your heart skip a beat?

* It isn't Love, it's Infatuation.

Do you pardon their faults because you care about them?

* It isn't Love, it's Friendship.

Do you tell them every day they are the only one you think of?

* It isn't Love, it's a Lie.

Are you willing to give all of your favorite things for their sake?

* It isn't Love, it's Charity.

Does your heart ache and break when they're sad?

* Then it's Love.

Are you attracted to others, but stay with them faithfully without regret?

* Then it's Love.

Do you accept their faults because they're a part of who they are?

* Then it's Love.

Do you cry for their pain, even when they're strong?

* Then it's Love.

Do their eyes see your true heart, and touch your soul so deeply it hurts?

* Then it's Love.

But do you stay because a blinding, incomprehensible mix of pain and elation pulls you close and holds you?

* Then it's Love.

Would you give them your heart, your life, your death? [gossipme.us,2010]

* Then it's Love.

Now, if Love is painful, and tortures us so,
why do we Love?
Why is it all we search for in life?
This pain, this agony?
Why is it all we long for?
This torture, this powerful death of self?
Why?
Because it's...
Love

~Author: Unknown

How To Encourage Yourself - Don't Quit

12.12.2010
The road of life we each travel isn't one endless stretch of flat, paved expressway, but rather, is filled with curves, valleys, detours, potholes and bumps. Life is very unpredictability and that is what makes it so interesting and alluring. It's that unpredictability that makes for some real gut-tightening questions and fears as well.

Ever feel like quitting? "Are you kidding?" you ask, "A better question would be, 'How many times TODAY have I felt like quitting?' " Sure. We've all felt like "throwing in the towel" at one time or another. If you haven't, I suggest that you check your pulse quickly. And here's a real shocker for you: the notion that "winners never quit" is a crock! Everyone - even "winners"- has not only felt like it, but has even quit at one time or another.

Having said that, I do feel that we, too often, give up on our dreams too easily and quickly - perhaps, just one small step short of success. So what do you do when the going gets tough and you feel like quitting? Here are ten strategies that you can employ when you hit those apparent "roadblocks" on your road of life:

1. Remember the reason(s) you started in the first place. What was the "spark" that caused you to begin the journey? Revisiting that may help rekindle the flame that helps you go on.

2. Ask yourself, "What would I rather be doing?" If nothing compelling comes to mind, then determine the next step you need to take to move you closer to your original destination. If something more compelling does come to mind, maybe you need to quit.

3. List 10 reasons why you CAN keep going. What strengths and resources do you possess that will help you achieve your desired outcome? Just the very act of doing this shifts your focus from the problem to the solution.

4. Give yourself permission to quit. Sounds crazy, but it works. When you set up an internal law that says, "I can't quit." Or "I shouldn't quit", it makes the desire to quit even stronger.

5. Give yourself a need to continue. Rather than focus on why you feel you need to quit, focus on why you need to continue. What's the payoff, the reward waiting for you if you persevere?

6. Stop focusing on the struggle and start focusing on the solution. Whatever you focus on expands. If your focus is on the struggle you are experiencing, that becomes the biggest (and maybe even the ONLY) thing on your "horizon" It blocks out many, if not all, of the creative opportunities and solutions that may be trying to present themselves to you.

7. Take a hard look at your methodology. Tired of getting poor or less than optimum results from your efforts? Then why keep doing things the same way an expecting something different to happen? That's the classic definition of insanity! Ask yourself, "What's the most radical or unorthodox action I could take right now?" Try it.

8. Make a contract with yourself. Write out what you intend to accomplish and how you intend to accomplish it and then give yourself, say, six months to achieve your goal. Sign and date it and keep it where you can see it. You might even impose some kind of "penalty" for breaking the contract - no chocolate for a month, maybe.

9. Get real. Were you enticed by the "illusion" that success is easy? Maybe you were enamored by the "fluff" that if you just want something badly enough, it will find its way to your doorstep. Success is WORK. Pure and simple. It is the result of a certain mindset as well as a set of deliberate actions. If you want to quit something, then quit fooling yourself by thinking it's going to be a "piece of cake".

10. Walk away. Sometimes looking at something too hard or long obscures the solutions. It's the "can't see the forest for the trees" phenomenon. By simply walking away or taking a break from the struggle to solve, you often free your mind to see new options and opportunities. [sap-basis-abap,2010]