Pay attention to what you say

It is always a bad idea to speak your mind without taking the time "to think before you speak." Remember, once the words come out of your mouth, there is no way to put them back in. If you say something which hurts someone, you may try to repair the damage by apologizing, but depending on the circumstances, the damage may be done.

Therefore, the best way to speak your mind effectively is to think carefully about what you say. You can become a master of getting your point across to others without being rude in the process.

Many people are not assertive because they are too aggressive. They are quick to insult others, and some even resort to using foul language in order to make sure they get their point across. Behaving in this manner will almost always drive people away.

In many cases, when you are blatantly rude when speaking your mind, your words will simply "go in one ear and come out the other." While people will hear you, they will not listen with attention, or if they do, they will only hear the negative things that you said.

The ability to speak your mind properly is a critical skill that should never be taken for granted. In this world, there will be times when you will need to get your point across, and depending on the field you work in, this could be daily.

By thinking about the things you say before you say it, you will save yourself a lot of headaches, and you will often be able to maintain relationships which would otherwise be lost. It is also important to make sure you avoid "not saying anything," as this will only cause feelings to build up inside you.

Not saying anything is just as bad as saying the wrong thing. If someone or something is bothering you, not saying anything for fear of causing conflict will not help the situation. In most cases, the person offending you may not realize they are doing it, and if you do not tell them anything, they will keep doing it. But if you explode, or tell them something that is harsh, this is equally as bad.

The assertive person is someone who explains themselves to others and they will do so in a way that is not offensive.

The Four Ways to Test Your Thinking and Anger

The following are the considerations you need to think of to clearly see the effects of your negative thinking and anger. This is also a good measurement if you have already achieved positive thinking and have controlled your anger.

• Look at the results – The biggest indicator of positive thinking and controlled anger is to know what you have done lately. Have been aggressive lately or have failed miserably in a project that you could have done? You will be able to gauge your disposition based on your success. Being grumpy and feeling bad about the situation will most likely get you nowhere.

• In case of failure, know the causes – Of course, a positive attitude does not give you immediate and positive results. Some things cannot just be pushed through. Take a look at some of the causes of failure and see whether you have done the best you can and easily gave up because you got frustrated easily.

• Put yourself on other’s perspective – A good measurement of your attitude towards work and family is to put yourself in other’s perspective. What could be the current feeling of your friends, family and co-workers regarding your current actions? Their perspective will provide you with an even more objective measurement if you are already been more positive and have controlled your anger.

• Your personal philosophy – What is your current motto or belief in life? This is just a simple and could even be a silly question but everyone has a belief system. Scrutinize your belief system and know if they have worked for your advantage lately. [exforsys Inc,2010]

The power of positive thinking... try it! you'll enjoy ur life more...

Generally, people are tends to be more pessimistic in thoughts and how they see the world really careful; to ensure they can prevent and avoid the bad things to be caused. So, let see which approach you are adapting in ur life "half full or half empty"?, is it nature or nurture? so..let's find out yourself and decide whether you want to half full or half empty!

According to the additional research; it is shown that the power of positive thinking will make you to enjoy and worth ur life more than everything else on earth; it may include as following:

There is always someone else worse off than you. Why don't u take a second to make a list of things you are thankful for such as, your sight, health, family, food, shelter, a pet, your kids, friends, a good book, drama, knowledge, etc...If you could even get out of bed this morning, then you are blessed. Do not take all this good fortune for granted. Be thankful for all these blessings.

1.Let Yourself Be Happy.

Better to enjoy every minutes of your life, coz as it is said that, life is like a river - you cannot touch the same water twice!

2. What You Give Is What You Get.
If you give love and kindness to others, you will probably find yourself overflowing with love and happiness. But if you give bitterness, cynicism, and negativity, that is what you will attract. In the mirror of life, you are reflected back, so let your goodness shine out. your attitude is the most important thing of ur life, so be aware of these. whatever your attitude is toward others; you'll get it in return; though it is not today, but might be tomorrow... who knows! Life is like this...

3. Notice the Positive Side of Life.
Even though we are surrounded with love and positive things every day, the negative side of life seems to get a lot more publicity. Too many negative images sap us of our optimism. So don't make a constant diet of negative people, newscasts, angry music, violent movies, and conflict. (Kids do not benefit from watching too many news shows and violence on TV.) Surround yourself with happy, positive people and situations whenever you can... Remember: don't nurture urself with those minus, but plus side!


4. Smile at Strangers and at Yourself.

Everyone is attracted to happy people. They make us feel better. You can be one of those people. You'll cheer up both yourself and those around you. Besides, frowning makes wrinkles. Laugh at yourself or u can surprise ur beloved or ur best friend by send them any funny cards or ask them out to watch funny movies. Enjoy yourself and have some fun (just not at anyone's expense). Laughter can cure what ills you and make life fun. So let's sign out from ur broken heart-door to find someone who can really make u smile; and once you find the right person, learn to worth every second with them or u will never earn another minute after the loss or even the last time to see their smile. Do what u think is right and impacts no one, don't be careless and ignore those who always care and dare to die for you or u'll live ur whole lives with regret and the black shadow at every steps you take.

Hope the above article can give u some ideas to polish ur life and open ur locked-heart to see the world broader and lighter.
Live our own world and enjoy the presence moment with those around us... great luck, people! :)